August 1997 feed hollywood by Mike Stiles |
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Vote for Me, I Kick Ass
I can honestly say that you should run ... don't walk ... in fact, fly to see
Air Force One. It is
every bit the crowd pleaser you think it is. And believe me, there was a
crowd, even at
the 1:00 matinee. People have seen the trailer for this and seem
particularly drawn to the
idea of a President of the United States who single-handedly rescues loved
ones from
violent, fiery special-effects deaths, while at the same time saving the
country and
keeping us all safe for democracy. Wonder if his Chief of Staff wrote all
that down on
his day's schedule. But this "elected official as action hero" thing
brings up an
interesting question.
How come this movie didn't get made when George Bush was President? You
think the
movie going public would have trouble seeing a Bush-like President knocking
out
terrorists, blowing people away with weapons, flying through the air and
winning in
hand-to-hand combat? The notion might be bringing a little smile to your
face, but you
know it's true. Why is it only now believable that a President could be
all that? What is
this just-under-the-surface psycho-sexual need we have to elevate our image
of Bill
Clinton even further ... into that of an action hero?
The fact is, George Bush actually was a pilot and did fly combat and did
parachute
through the air and land in the ocean. Clinton couldn't even walk down
some steps
without sustaining a disabling injury that had him crippled for months.
But there's
dashing Harrison Ford, with his coincidental strong, independent First
Lady, and his
coincidental only, teenaged, intelligent daughter. Hell, even Teddy
Roosevelt has been
given the action-hero treatment on TNT. I feel sorry for Al Gore should
any terrorist
incident come up during his presidency. We'll expect him to strap on the
latest high-tech
special forces weaponry and single-handedly send them all to meet their maker.
But sometimes I forget that hey, it's just good-time, feel-good
entertainment. And a great
ride it is. We're treated to one daring rescue attempt that will remind
you of Airport '76,
and probably the best "jumbo jet crashing into the ocean" footage you'll
ever see. And
everyone turns in a grade A performance. From Ford's continuing ability to
make even
the toughest hero seem scared out of his mind, to Gary Oldman's "just wait
til you see
me as Dr. Smith" ice cold villainy, to Glenn Close as a Vice President
enduring a real
trial by fire. I wonder if her campaign slogan was, "Are you voters
ignoring me?
Because I will not be ignored, voters!!" Lots of fundraising
rabbit-boilings, that kind of
thing.
Sure there are parts that are a little predictable. What's not to predict
about an action
movie? "Hey, I'll bet that thing there goes BOOM." And, as usual, you
need to
completely put aside anything you know about physics, aerodynamics, the
human body,
and other such nuisances in order to really buy into what's happening. But
you care
about the characters and it keeps your heart pumping, so you get what you
came for.
Plus, with Air Force One coming out after Independence Day, I've finally
decided that I
simply cannot vote for a man for President unless he can leap into any
plane, at any time,
and suddenly fly it expertly in combat. I just wouldn't feel safe.
in the junk drawer:
July 1997
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