Wish List for 2000
Resolving things at the beginning of a New Year seems a silly thing
to do -- you're making demands on yourself, after all. Here at
SMUG, we aim to make demands of somebody else, always have, and New
Year is no different. So for the second year in a row -- which
qualifies as "annual" by the way -- I hereby offer the Ear Candy Wish
List.
Last year we hit about 50-50. I won't run down the entire list, but
we did manage to get a fabulous Built to Spill record, two by Prince
Paul, and double the number requested from Super Furry Animals. On
the other hand, Black Box Recorder's stateside debut was
somnambulant, and The Sebadoh wasn't much livelier.
However, we're terminal optimists here at SMUG, and if nothing else,
we've always believed our mothers when they said, "It can't hurt to
ask." [That "if you can't say something nice" thing, though, is total
bullshit.] So, assuming that the world won't end and that power will
be restored in a few days, we trust that the music industry will be
able to handle a few of our requests.
De La Soul: Not Dead
We were teased with the possibility of the first of De La Soul's
three-part Art Official Intelligence starting around July, but
it never materialized. Now scheduled for May 2000 (but don't hold
your breath), here's hoping that their second Prince Paul-less record
brings back some of that familiar lazy-manic De La magic.
What about Bob?
After a much publicized retirement from his loud sound, Bob Mould's
been awfully quiet. Apart from a consulting gig for the WWF (or NWO,
who bothers fact checking around here?), there's been nary a squeak
from the guy. Pleasant memories of a pre-Sugar acoustic tour have
started to reverberate, and it's about time Mr. Mould took the
twelve-string into the studio and tore his heart out once again.
Bring back the 5
I asked last year and was unheard, it seems. Where's the long-awaited
full-length from Jurassic 5? Granted, we got around half of 'em on
the half-Latin half-something else Ozomatli disc, but it was nowhere
near as satisfying as their terrific Ep, "EP."
British Invasion, 2nd request
Baby Bird continues to languish across the pond, not an exciting
addition to US radio charts when Backstreet Britney rules the roost.
Still, maybe we're ready to hear good pop music that's not totally
chirpy -- bring on Baby Bird's There's Something Going On
already. Ditto the debut by The Webb Brothers, which was rumored for
March release and now rumored for Not. And what about that last
Tindersticks record?
More ketchup, please
Stereolab seems to be grabbing even more accolades for Cobra and
Phases than they did for Dots and Loops. Too bad neither
of 'em are all that good. Maybe this year they can go into the studio
and really play (as in frolic, not generate sound) like they
did with the unbelievably, orgiastically good Emperor Tomato
Ketchup.
Bastard of Old
Is it too much to ask that Paul Westerberg get over getting old and
maybe make a rock record?
End this tyranny of Vinyl!
Not really. But wouldn't it be nice to have the Beastie Boys' Blow
Up Factor 12" release compiled on discs as the series progresses?
Allow me to answer my own hypothetical question: yes.
Kool Keith will find another collaborator who pisses him off
Keith's prolific as hell, so even though he did two records this
year, it doesn't seem a lot to ask him to turn around and do another
for 2000. He produces his best work, it seems, with people who
eventually alienate him, like Dan the Automator and Dr.
Octagonacologyst, whereas his trusted collaborators end up
helping him produce tepid stuff like Dr. Dooom. Maybe Prince Paul can coax greatness out of Hip
Hop's supreme freak again.
I asked the SMUG staff to weigh in this year -- here's what many
of them are looking forward to, or just looking for, in
ought-ought:
3-Way
Leslie poses the burning question: Can Neutral Milk Hotel make a new
record good enough to complete a hat trick?
Get Back
We're never satisfied: Sometimes we want our heroes to find the spark
-- brought on by joy or misery -- that lit us up in the past. Among
those whose past glories we would like to be recaptured: Can't Mark
Lanegan repair the damage his last two records did? asks Leslie.
Scout especially misses the Vic Chestnut of old, and also asks if
Bill Berry can return to REM and make his old band matter.
Compile them and we will come
Todd reminds us all that there are plenty of good bands awaiting the
Greatest Hits treatment, including but not limited to Camper Van
Beethoven -- as if Cracker and the Monks of Doom could compensate us
for the (still catastrophic) loss of CVB. Plus, Todd asks, what about
a six-CD box set of Prince -- since the five-disc Crystal Ball
was really only three, plus that weird acoustic one, plus the even
weirder ballet. Shit, what about just one good Prince CD, while we're
asking for the moon. Labels that could stand a retrospective include
IRS, 4AD, and Teen Beat.
Where have you gone?
Many of the SMUG staff have risen up . . . in search of favorite
artists MIA in '99. For 2000, we'd welcome the return of Wedding
Present, Breeders, Devo, Lambchop, Portastatic (superchunk is dead;
long live portastatic!), Ass Ponys, Halo Benders, Steve Earle (the rocker,
please,
not Mr. Bluegrass). . . .
Duh
Both Joe and Scout would like (separate but equal) record contracts.
You love me, you really love me
And finally, in 2000, we at SMUG would like those musicians who are
secretly in love with us to go public with their affection at long
last -- to wit: Juliana Hatfield loves Scout, John Doe digs Leslie,
Grace Jones has a jones for Todd (though he claims it's already
confirmed), Courtney Love hearts Joe (ditto), Mel C. (that'd be
Sporty Spice) is into Josh, Bjork is devoted to Brian, Claudia Gonson
of the Magnetic Fields carries a torch for Gregory, and David Bowie
can't stop thinking about Ben, you know, that way.
What are you looking forward to this year? Blab away.
ben@smug.com
in the junk drawer: