August1998
s m u g
target audience
by Leslie Harpold

*

Smart Food

dr dorie's don't diet book

I'm not going to mislead you -- this column is mostly for chicks this month. When we were in college we went through the universal process -- you know, the parade of books we have recommended to us by trusted friends and Feminism professors about diet and weight and body Issues. Fat is a Feminist Issue, Feeding the Hungry Heart, 30 Days to Thinner Thighs, Diets Don't Work and Fit For Life.

If you didn't start the cycle with an eating disorder, surely you developed one by the time you were through, and sufficiently stunted your metabolism in the process.

If there's one thing I know how to do and well, it's lose weight. I can't keep it off as efficiently but I know that 100 days of coffee, 300 packs of cigarettes, 600 packets of Sweet N Low, 400 gallons of water and 22 pints of half and half will do it, especially when combined with a good dose of angst and a lot of sex. It also leaves you malnourished, and your hair is brittle and starts to break a lot. Now, anyone will tell you that once your hair starts falling out, you're in deep trouble.

Now, I know the answers, and so do you. Just like we know we shouldn't date musicians, cross our legs at the knee (it's the ankles ladies!), pick up on the first ring, go out without sunscreen, or wear black shoes and carry a brown bag. Sometimes though, you just can't help it. Things happen. Pretty soon you get used to it, forget the rules and go for broke, and forget that you were ever trying to follow some. So - how do you stay on track?

You have a few options. You could be like my friend Betty who has the most amazing body I've ever seen. Here is her day: get up, eat two coffee nips while reading the New York Times, get on the treadmill for 90 minutes, get on the stairmaster for 90 minutes and eat three coffee nips. Eat one cup of spinach and one cup of mashed potatoes every night. get on the treadmill whenever the phone rings, and one more 90 minute Stairmaster set before bed. Marry a guy who makes 400K a year, because you won't have time for work. Have no social life. Forget why you were doing it in the first place. You're also welcome to never watch television, read fashion magazines or look at any advertising, and you'll never need any extra input.

Lots of diet gurus want you to change everything, be more acetic, for your own good. While that's not wrong, I only recently encountered someone who said be more happy, here are some suggestions, find your joy and while you're doing that, here are some really basic principals to help you get back on track and start thinking about food like a regular person so you can get more done and and find your joy. I didn't have to sweat to Oldies, I didn't have some affected man in hotpants try to cry with me, and mercifully, I didn't have to lose my gen-x sense of irony and memorize a fistful of catch phrases. No trading cards for food. No mantras. Just the basics, the things I forgot along the way. No clutching the book to my breast every time I thought about opening my mouth.

In the interest of disclosure, the book was a gratis review copy. Dr. Dorie's "Don't Diet" Book is refreshingly free of the usual malarky about being the best you that you can be and more a get to the roots of your lifestyle and rebuild kind of thing. It's not a prescription for a lifestyle that would challenge even the most diligent soccer mom. Basically, you act as if you never had a problem, throw out all the games and deals you make with yourself and get on with the things that really matter to you. Reading the book was a catharsis for all the years of overthinking I've put in.

Here's the best part. I felt like I was being talked to not at. There was no sense of being reprimanded and having to pay some sort of retribution for past sins. I was not talked down to, or coddled. The book addresses the reader for what they are - and hope to be. A bright, rational critical thinker who's been around the block a few times. No crocodile tears, no permission to feel sorry for yourself, none of that self indulgent baby boomer "it's not me it's society" crap. Why this woman is such an underground hero so far is clear - she makes sense and she's not selling anything but solid information. If I ever meet her I'm going to suggest she get a crazy haircut or learn to be really obnoxious - some gimmick that will help her get the word out. meanwhile, you're smart, you're sexy, and no matter how much you weigh, if you've ever felt like it was you versus ice cream, and ice cream won, this book is worth a read. You're smart enough to get the point. Then most importantly, get on with your life.

Yes, she has a web site, yes, Dr. Dorie (Dorie McCubbrey, M.S., Ed., Ph.D. to be specific) is a real doctor, (bioengineering) with a masters in counseling.

Unfortunately for the writer in me, there's no Dorie specific catch phrase to end the article with to further my endorsement of a marketing plan that has merits in reality. So I'll just remind you that while No One is Sexier Than You... I'm catching up.

leslie@smug.com

*

in the junk drawer:

featurecar
net
worth
chair
bumping
uglies
gun
smoking
jacket
barcode
ear
candy
pie
feed
hollywood
lock
target
audience
scissors
back
issues
dice
compulsionvise
posedowncheese
the
biswick
files
toothbrush
mystery
date
wheelbarrow
and such
and such
hat
blabfan
kissing
booth
martini





dr dorie's don't diet book







     
·feature· ·net worth· ·bumping uglies· ·smoking jacket· ·ear candy· ·feed hollywood· ·target audience· ·back issues· ·compulsion· ·posedown· ·the biswick files· ·mystery date· ·and such and such· ·blab· ·kissing booth·


·contents· ·freakshow· ·fan club· ·archive·



???

copyright © 1996 - 1998 fearless media